Feeling Like I’m Going to be Forgotten. Is that What I’m Most Afraid of?
Something I’m most afraid of
Assalamualaikum, how are you doing? I wish you well, especially your heart.
I’ll start with a question from my friend, “What are you most afraid of in this world?” I replied “forgotten”
Is that really the case? Is everyone afraid of being forgotten? or am I the only one who feels so?
Am I really afraid of being forgotten? it turned out not to be so. What am I most afraid of? If I answer Hell. But I didn’t do much to avoid it. If I answer death. I don’t feel afraid of death, because what I believe happens after death is much scarier than that.
What are you most afraid of? What am I most afraid of? I thought about this seriously. It turns out that what I fear most is MYSELF.
I’m afraid of myself. I’m afraid of myself who easily feels ignored, feels unappreciated, feels forgotten.
So, for myself being timid towards myself. I wrote down this Untitled poem.
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The twilight sky sat in front of my house which was wet with drizzle.
The light wasn’t enough to dry out the cold tiles.
Flocks of birds flew over it, while forming a line of smiles in the sky.
Nor was I able to comfort my heart.
Look at that horizon slowly becoming a dark blue color.
One by one a point of luster sticks out from behind the hill of fatigue.
Then began to look at the exhausting night.
Accompanied by the chirping of heaven deliberately falling into the ears.
The voice soothed my soul until the echo ended.
Then afterwards, the heart fell into a dead silence again.
I wanted to be buried every word of it stabbed me.
I wanted to scream as the knife tore my consciousness apart.
However, all I did was sit still, staring at the empty road.
While occasionally imagining myself invisible.
Because I don’t want anyone to vanish,
Then just let me disappear slowly.
I didn’t expect to be forgotten.
Maybe someone will remember something about me.
Maybe I’ll keep it in one space of his memories.
Maybe I’ll end up in his poem.
Maybe I will be loved by him until the rest of his age.
Maybe
It’s only possible.
